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Allen Domelle

Removing Drama From The Home


Home is supposed to be a place that is an oasis from the drama of the world. It should not to be a reality show that you live out, but it is to be the one place you look forward to going at the end of the day. Sadly, for many, home is a place they want to avoid because of the drama they have to endure.

When God created the home, He also created the atmosphere which He intended for the home. Genesis 2:8 says, “And the LORD God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed.” As a single man, Adam enjoyed the quietness of a perfect world, but he was lonely. So, God put Adam to sleep, “…and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.” There you have the first home in a quiet, sinless atmosphere. There was no drama in this first home. This first home enjoyed the peace of working together and the presence of God daily in the cool of the day.

This quiet atmosphere vanished when Adam and Eve took of the forbidden fruit. Sin entered into the home, peace left and drama began. Their two children, Cain and Abel, could not get along with each other to the point where Cain plotted to kill Abel. He carried out that plan which caused great drama in that home. Sadly, what used to be a home of peace and tranquility became a home filled with drama.

You can have a home that is not filled with drama. Your home doesn't have to resemble a reality television show. God wants your home life to resemble the peace and tranquility that Adam and Eve enjoyed before they opened the door to a drama filled home. Let me give several suggestions on how to remove drama from your home.

1. Keep sin from your home.

Sin is the ultimate reason homes are filled with drama. If you remove sin, you will remove the drama. Romans 6:23 says, “The wages of sin is death…” You cannot allow sin to run through the home and not see death to peace and tranquility. Any sin will bring drama into your home. The world may paint sin as normal, but they never show you the drama it brings to one’s life and their home. If you want to keep your life or home free of drama, then keep yourself from sin.

2. Keep a clear role of authority.

One of the reasons drama fills the home is because we have lost the proper roles of authority. God established the role of authority in Ephesians 5:23 when He says, “For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.” Notice, the proper role is the husband is to submit to God and the wife is to submit to the husband.

God makes the roles even clearer when He says, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.” (Ephesians 6:1) If the children obey their parents, and the wife follows her husband’s leadership, you will find a home that has no drama. The home must follow God’s role for authority to keep peace in it. Staying in God’s ordained role of authority for the home is the only way to avoid drama.

3. Don't play the comparison game.

Don't allow yourself to compare your home to someone else’s. God says in 2 Corinthians 10:12, “For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise.” Your family has its own unique dynamics, and you must not allow yourself to compare your home to another’s. Enjoy each other and live according to God’s Word, and you won’t need to compare one to another.

4. Make Christ your central focus.

Another great reason that homes are filled with drama is because they get their eyes off Christ and onto themselves. Our focus should always be on Christ. When we become self-centered and try to make everything revolve around ourselves, our selfishness creates drama. Philippians 2:3 shows us that Christ must be our focus when it says, “Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves.” When you get your eyes off yourself, you will end the drama that strife and vainglory create.

5. Guard family associations.

This reminds me of Amnon who allowed the wrong association in his life which created family drama. If you have the wrong associations in your life, then you will find their sinful influences will be brought into your home. Many homes have lost their tranquility because of the associations of parents or children. Carefully guard your family associations. Realize that associations influence the spirit of your home.

6. Keep your finances right.

Poor finances always brings tension into the home. When you have bill collectors constantly calling, you can't help but become short tempered which results in a drama filled home. Control your money and live by a budget, and you can avoid the drama caused by poor finances.

7. Keep life simple!

Proverbs 23:5 says, “Wilt thou set thine eyes upon that which is not? for riches certainly make themselves wings; they fly away as an eagle toward heaven.” Don’t allow yourself to get caught up in possessions. The more things your bring into your home, the more complicated your home becomes. Don’t acquire a covetous mentality that you must always have what others have. Keep your life simple, and you will control the drama in your home.

8. Don’t bring the drama from work home.

One mistake many make is that they bring the drama from work home. Let me encourage you to leave the drama from work at work. I understand there are times when you need to talk to someone, but you cannot continually dump on your spouse about what is going on at work without it eventually destroying their spirit. If you have a bad day at work, don't bring that bad day home. Your spouse or children didn't cause the stress of your day, so don't take it out on them. Leave the drama from work at work.

Home can truly be a place that is enjoyable. If you guard these eight areas, you will find your home to be a place that is filled with a spirit of joy and happiness. Let your home be that Garden of Eden where you enjoy the peace and tranquility that God intended. Don’t lose your Garden of Eden. Follow God’s instructions and commands, and you will always be able to make your home a Garden of Eden that is drama free.

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