Speaking the Truth in Love

Ephesians 4:15

But speaking the truth in love, may grow up into him in all things, which is the head, even Christ:

If you were to come to my church, you would hear a preacher who some would say that he preaches hard. Oh, that statement may come from the mouths of those who are members of the church, but they would not say this in a derogatory manner. Rather, they would make this statement about my preaching as a compliment. It would be a compliment because they know I love them enough to preach the truth, even if the truth may seem to be directed at them. The people who are part of my church family know that their preacher loves them dearly, dearly enough to always preach the truth.

Paul commanded us to speak the truth in love. Nothing will make a greater difference in someone’s life than for someone to love them enough to tell them the truth. We live in days when many feel that “hard preaching” runs people off, and it may; however, what some call hard preaching is preaching that speaks the truth in love, but that love will make a difference in the heart of the one who needs to hear the truth because they are doing wrong. Let me share several thoughts about this truth that pastors, preachers, Sunday school teachers, and parents need to consider.

First, it is not love to withhold the truth because you feel it may offend someone. There are many preachers who only preach what makes people feel good, but that is not true love. The one who loves you the most is the one who will tell you the truth, even if the truth offends you. Who do you think loves you the most: the preacher who lets you do wrong and won’t tell you the truth because it will offend you, or the preacher who will tell you the truth to warn you about the adverse consequences of what you are doing? Of course, the latter preacher is the one who loves you the most. Don't get upset at the one who tells you the truth when you are doing wrong; they love you enough to tell you the truth.

Second, nobody will grow in the LORD without someone speaking the truth in love. Both speaking the truth and speaking it in love is necessary for people to grow. If I speak the truth without speaking it in love, the truth will not help people to grow. Likewise, to speak without speaking the truth will not grow people either. Truth spoken in love may offend, but it is the only way anyone can grow in the Lord.

Third, truth will at times seem harsh, but love takes the jagged edges off so the one doing wrong will receive it. The more you love people, the more truth you can speak to them. If you are just preaching a sermon so you can preach, the truth in that sermon will repel those listening to you. However, you can preach the same sermon in love, and the love you have for those you are preaching to will make a difference in their hearts and lives.

Fourth, the more you love, the more people will take any truth from you. You need not worry if the truth you will preach will run someone off if you love them because your love for them will allow them to take the truth you are preaching. My friend, learn to love people greatly, and they will take the spoken truth right. Certainly, truth can offend people, but truth spoken in love allows the one doing the wrong to take the truth in the right way, resulting in them growing in the Lord. If you truly want people to grow, you will speak the truth in love.