Proverbs 16:7
When a man's ways please the LORD, he maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him.
God makes a clear declaration that the way to fix your problems in life is to fix your relationship with Him. God says that when your ways please the LORD peace is found. It is interesting that God says He maketh his enemies to be at peace with Him. The enemies is talking about your problems with others. People are not your problems, but the issues that keep us from being right are what keeps people from being right with each other. If you get your problems right with God, and they get their problems right with God, you will find that you can be at peace with anyone.
I often have people come for counseling about their marriage hoping that I will tell their spouse what they need to do to treat the other person right. However, when I counsel people, my objective is not to get them to treat each other right; my objective is to get both to treat God right. I have learned that every relationship problem is a relationship problem, your relationship between you and God. If you fix your relationship with God, you will fix your relationship with man. God is saying that if we work on the vertical relationship, we can fix any horizontal relationship. Let me give a couple thoughts about this great truth.
First, I cannot fix the horizontal, but I can fix the vertical. I cannot change one person, but I can change my relationship with God. If you focus all your energies on getting yourself right with God, you will find that your relationships with man will start to get right. We focus too much on trying to fix the horizontal relationships, and we fail; however, the moment I start fixing my vertical relationship with God is when the horizontal relationships start to get mended.
Second, when I focus on the vertical, I realize that I am the problem in the relationship. This might be the greatest key to fixing relationships. The reason God wants us to work on our relationship with Him is because His righteousness reveals our unrighteousness; thus, we can start working on the problem in every relationship, ourselves. When I keep my eyes on God, I see where I am wrong, and when I start to fix my problems with God, I am also fixing the problems I have with others.
Third, when I stop trying to get people to treat me right but point them to God is when we come to peace with each other. I want you to notice that God says, he maketh even his enemies to be at peace with him. This making peace with him is not about making peace with man, but with God. In other words, when I get myself right with God and focus on the vertical, it gets those whom I have problems with to focus on God, which results in them making peace with God.
Fourth, the key to any relationship finding peace is for both sides to be focused on making peace with God in their lives. When both sides fix their problems with God is when they will find peace with each other. The key to fixing any relationship problem is to work on your relationship with God. If you fix what is hurting your fellowship with God, you will find your relationship with God will be what it is supposed to be, which results in you being at peace with others. My friend, stop trying to fix everyone else and fix your relationship with God, and you will find you will be at peace, not only with God, but with others also.
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